Advice please

RE: Advice please

Anthony Dennison — Sat, 07 Aug 2021 17:08:23 GMT

I think the fact that you are able to talk about it and you have concerns re: drugs and are aware of it is a positive; you recognise risks and know what you need to be worried about.

Echo all that has been said so far, keep talking.

RE: Advice please

Bob Russell — Fri, 06 Aug 2021 12:42:28 GMT

Does it help talking to us 'armchair experts'?

If so keep going but remember we are not really experts!!!

RE: Advice please

Gillian Mostyn — Thu, 05 Aug 2021 21:42:35 GMT

That all sounds really tough anon, and its not surprising you're having some difficult times.

You maybe need to readjust how you think of your illness? If you had a fractured limb or a twisted gut, you wouldn't hesitate to get help and wouldn't give it a moment's thought. You certainly wouldn't see it as a personal weakness or having a long term impact on your ability as a vet. You say you're now getting professional help, which is great. You need medical help to heal, and to find ways to work with your triggers to keep yourself well in the long term. But what you really shouldn't do is see it as any kind of failure or weakness on your part. It is illness, same as any other illness.

If you're exposed to triggers at work, is it possible to discuss them with your colleagues and try to put in some procedures to minimize them? In the same way as if you had a bad back you'd get a taller consulting table and a stool?

Keep talking to people - and take care x

RE: Advice please

An On MRCVS — Thu, 05 Aug 2021 16:59:17 GMT

thank you.

I struggle with PTSD and dissociation. Talking about things is really difficult as I get so confused and then I don't really remember or understand what is happening. There are many triggers some of which do happen at work so I have tried very hard over the years to hide everything. Unfortunately this strategy is starting to fall apart and I have been hospitalised several times (i have lost count) over the last couple of years.

I am slowly learning to recognise what is happening and starting to talk to professionals and one close friend which I think is helping.

I really appreciate everyone's concern and help.

RE: Advice please

Julian Earl — Tue, 03 Aug 2021 21:15:37 GMT

P;lease take it from me!! Talk to someone. VetLife are an excellent place to start! If you know my history you might understand that I feel strongly about this? I was advised by counsellors not to be ashamed of deptression , anxiety and mental health issues but tell people. They are more understanding than you might expect! Also if you are lucky as I was you will discover that you have g=far, far more very good friends than you ever really expected! That was one of the nicest things to discover, albeit the hard way in my case!! Both within the professuon and outside of it as well! Good luck and very best wishes! Iwas told at the start that these feelings are not a sign of weakness, nothing about which anyone should be ashamed hence talk to Vetlife first would be my srong recommendation!!

HTH??

RE: Advice please

Julie Innes — Tue, 03 Aug 2021 20:36:56 GMT

Echoing the others: the RCVS would be concerned FOR you, not about you! you have no worries on that score!

I'm glad you're getting some help- that means that you understand this is something you can get through and have actively sought out a way to work things out, and that's a good start. As others have said, you can never have too much help! Talking to vetlife, on here, in other forums will let you realise that you are not the only one who is going through this or who has come out the other side. Keep talking.

RE: Advice please

Gillian Mostyn — Tue, 03 Aug 2021 17:43:29 GMT

Take care anon.

RE: Advice please

An On MRCVS — Tue, 03 Aug 2021 15:38:42 GMT

Hi,

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for replying. It means a lot, I really appreciate it.

RE: Advice please

Sarah Wheadon — Fri, 30 Jul 2021 08:08:02 GMT

Another voice to encourage you to contact Vetlife - you can email rather than call if you are more comfortable communicating via the written word.

In case you have any lingering worries about the RCVS, be reassured that Vetlife is confidential,anonymous and completely separate from the RCVS.

Do keep messaging here as well if it is helping you.

RE: Advice please

Gillian Mostyn — Thu, 29 Jul 2021 10:50:50 GMT

[quote userid="10402" url="~/001/nonclinical/f/off-duty-discussions/29942/advice-please/231576#231576"](I haven't spoken to anyone about my concerns re the drugs) [/quote]

OK. If you don't feel able to talk to people at work, could you talk to a friend or relative? Could you maybe leave your work keys with them so you can't be there alone?

The fact that you're talking about it and aware of the potential for a bad day to affect your decision making process is really positive. But please don't try to do this alone. My husband ended up in a really bad place because he wouldn't open up about how he felt. I promise you that a chat to the Samaritans or vetlife will really help - probably far more than you can imagine. What have you got to lose - that's anonymous too?!?!

RE: Advice please

An On MRCVS — Thu, 29 Jul 2021 10:33:43 GMT

Thank you to everyone for your replies. I really do appreciate it.

Work is the part of my life that causes me the least stress to be honest although I have was signed off for 3 weeks earlier in the year.

I feel reassured about the RCVS part, I hadn't thought of it like a broken leg etc, that really helps. Thank you Gillian.

I don't think i could face talking to people at work about it (I haven't spoken to anyone about my concerns re the drugs) but I can see that you are giving good advice.

Thank you again.

RE: Advice please

Jill Butterworth — Thu, 29 Jul 2021 09:26:08 GMT

Agree that it can be a good idea to take time away from work if you possibly can. When you are feeling wobbly and an animal dies unexpectedly, it can make you feel especially bad/at risk. If not working isn't an option, is there any way you can change to say consulting only, or even just doing easy stuff like mostly vaccines till you feel better. It depends on your set up.

All the best x

RE: Advice please

Gillian Mostyn — Thu, 29 Jul 2021 08:50:28 GMT

You're right to be concerned about your own decision making process. It is scary how awry our normal logical thoughts can go when we're unwell. But as Arlo has said, you have nothing to fear from the RCVS. Thinking you'd lose your MRCVS for mental illness is like thinking you'd lose it for getting a fractured limb or cancer. They're all just illnesses that manifest in different ways. Maybe you would be best taking time out to heal though, in the same way as you would with any other illness or stressful life event? As has been said, talk to vetlife.

Access to drugs is an issue. Like Lucy, I'd recommend you talk to your manager (or colleagues if you're the boss) and put in place some safeguards for yourself. Such as not having access to certain drugs and maybe not being able to be left alone in the practice at the moment? Not because you can't be trusted, but to give yourself that safety net. It takes strength to accept you're not well, and you've obviously done that already. Take care. x

RE: Advice please

Iain Richards — Thu, 29 Jul 2021 07:38:03 GMT

Absolutely call Vetlife.

The college has a health care protocol now to provide support in these instances. Good luck, get well

RE: Advice please

bob lehner — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 20:16:57 GMT

Call the VetLife helpline asap - 0303 040 2551. Open 24 hrs, Confidential advice from fellow professionals.

RE: Advice please

Lucy Fleming — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 18:49:39 GMT

Anon, very glad to hear you are getting help. May still be worth a chat with vet life, in addition to your psychiatrist, for a more veterinary specific take on things. It also sounds like it may be worth speaking to an employer as well - it can be a scary thing to do, and I hope you have someone you feel able to approach about it, but perhaps finding a practical way of restricting your access to these meds (eg requiring another key holder?) might give you all some reassurance. It sounds like your more rational brain really doesn't want you to reach for them in a moment of crisis when your less rational thoughts are louder. Some short term hassle of it taking a bit longer to fetch a potentially dangerous medication is more than worth it if it sees you safely through this period.

RE: Advice please

Arlo Guthrie — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 17:52:08 GMT

[quote userid="5904" url="~/001/nonclinical/f/off-duty-discussions/29942/advice-please/231557#231557"]Arlo may even set up. or know where to direct you if publicity or discussion isn't what you want?[/quote]

Tony, didn't understand your choice of words, cos I cant imagine anyone in this kind of situation seeks publicity.

But yes, anon, the two things about posting here with the anon account are that a) even I don't have a clue who you are, and b) Bob is absolutely right, you can be sure of a sympathetic, non judgemental ear here, or even a few of them!

Non of us are qualified, but if there is any way we can help, I am sure any one of us will.

In answer to your original question, I have been reporting on RCVS disciplinary proceedings (the only avenue through which you can be removed from the Register, AFAIK) for many many years. I do not remember seeing a single case where a veterinary surgeon has been suspended or removed from the Register for mental health issues. I don't think it would even be possible, because the process exists to prosecute professional misconduct, which mental health issues are obviously not. Plus of course, there is a much greater awareness and sympathy for mental health these days (things like Mind Matters).

A long winded answer. But I believe the answer to your question is no, you don't need to fear the RCVS removing you from the register. That absolutely should not be a barrier to you seeking and getting whatever help you need.

Thoughts with you.

RE: Advice please

Anthony Todd — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 17:15:00 GMT

I think you will find that most of us on here have had the same thoughts and severe worries that you have.

Ours is a profession that is in the centre of these reactions a lot of the time.

It may be that if you tell us what your "concerns" are there will be vets who have had the same and can help and advise.

You can stay anonymous yet still gain help and advice!!

Arlo may even set up. or know where to direct you if publicity or discussion isn't what you want?

RE: Advice please

Bob Russell — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 17:05:13 GMT

But you don't have to use the drugs!

It feels very easy but it is not. It is a big and scary decision that is irreversible.

I am not an expert but over the years I have tried to follow the philosophy that today may be the crappiest day in history but tomorrow is another day. Wake up with a clean slate and try again. Thankfully in the darkest days the next day has been OK!

Others will be along to give their wisdom but just keep talking to someone. You are An On and I have never known people on here to be judgemental when it comes to people having a tough time.

RE: Advice please

An On MRCVS — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 16:39:19 GMT

thank you for your reply.

I am getting help, am working with a psychiatrist at the moment. I suppose part of the issue is that I don't really either trust or understand my own thought processes. I am very aware that I have access to lots of drugs. I am quite scared.

RE: Advice please

Bob Russell — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 16:16:18 GMT

Not at all!

The medical profession is very experienced at dealing with mental health problems in vets (ask my GP!).

The RCVS will deal with those that might hurt patients.

Vet Helpline can help

https://www.vetlife.org.uk/how-we-help/vetlife-helpline/

Samaritans https://www.samaritans.org/

You can (if you feel like it) settle down on the VetSurgeon couch and give us a bit more information. You will get a surprisingly gentle and helpful hearing. Many have been there, got the T shirt. Many others will just provide support.

Life is pretty rough for many at the moment so you are not alone!

Talk to someone now!