Beep beep

RE: Beep beep

Mark Hedberg — Mon, 31 Jul 2017 15:43:28 GMT

[quote user="Anthony Dennison"]

[quote user="peter chalkley"]

may I ask what type of reader you were using?

one of our receptionists has just purchased 2 new puppies, so I excitedly called her to get her to scan them, but no beep. very disappointed.

[/quote]

I can actually visualise you reading this, jumping up from your computer and running to grab the chip scanner. And the look of pure disappointment on your face afterwards.

[/quote]

Depends on where he was putting the scanner, now, doesn't it? :)

RE: Beep beep

Martin Atkinson — Mon, 31 Jul 2017 13:31:33 GMT

Given the number of women clients who clutch their beloved pets under their bosom forcing you to try and avert your gaze away from their cleavage I'm surprised that I haven't come across this phenomenon before. Or perhaps I unwittingly have and the the number recorded on the pet's file is actually a breast implant.

RE: Beep beep

Anthony Dennison — Fri, 28 Jul 2017 15:13:25 GMT

[quote user="peter chalkley"]

may I ask what type of reader you were using?

one of our receptionists has just purchased 2 new puppies, so I excitedly called her to get her to scan them, but no beep. very disappointed.

[/quote]

I can actually visualise you reading this, jumping up from your computer and running to grab the chip scanner. And the look of pure disappointment on your face afterwards.

RE: Beep beep

Bob Russell — Fri, 28 Jul 2017 12:48:44 GMT

Do they register the patients temperature by any chance?

RE: Beep beep

peter chalkley — Fri, 28 Jul 2017 11:56:06 GMT

may I ask what type of reader you were using?

one of our receptionists has just purchased 2 new puppies, so I excitedly called her to get her to scan them, but no beep. very disappointed.

RE: Beep beep

J G Wray — Fri, 28 Jul 2017 08:34:01 GMT

Addendum:

I've contacted a family member and related the story. She has had a bilateral mastectomy and hysterectomy two years ago, so her implants are part of the reconstructive surgery. She has confirmed the chip thing, but says that because she has no dog she can't try beeping at the vets.

RE: Beep beep

J G Wray — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 19:45:06 GMT

Interesting fact number 3

https://plasticsurgeryarticles.com/blog/5-interesting-facts-breast-implants/

RE: Beep beep

Clive Ansell — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 18:49:02 GMT

[quote user="Wren"]

[quote user="Clive Ansell"]

The dog or its owner have recently consumed processed meat products containing horsemeat, along with microchips which were implanted within said horses.

[/quote]

Mmmmm. Nuchal ligament. Tasty...

[/quote]

Compared to some of the sh1te in processed food, it would be a comparative luxury I would think.

RE: Beep beep

bob lehner — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 18:23:30 GMT

[quote user="J G Wray"]

[quote user="Utlendigur"]But there were 2 chips - one in each cup? Just wondering - do breast implants have chips???[/quote]

Oh yes they do. Blimey that was hard work.

[/quote]

Blimey indeed - do breast implants have a habit of wandering off and getting lost and needing to be returned to their owner?

RE: Beep beep

Glen McIntosh — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 18:18:55 GMT

[quote user="J G Wray"]

[quote user="Utlendigur"]But there were 2 chips - one in each cup? Just wondering - do breast implants have chips???[/quote]

Oh yes they do. Blimey that was hard work.

[/quote]

Whale oil beef hooked, I did not know that.

Thanks JGW for yet another invaluable life lesson.

RE: Beep beep

Joyce Whitehead — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 17:43:15 GMT

Nor me!

RE: Beep beep

Lucy Fleming — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 17:12:55 GMT

[quote user="Neil Wheadon"]guess most of us were thinking this but were too shy to type it[/quote]

It didn't even occur to me!

RE: Beep beep

Martin Atkinson — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 17:09:52 GMT

[quote user="Neil Wheadon"]guess most of us were thinking this but were too shy to type it[/quote]Oh yeah? I was just wondering if you entered the chip number into Anibase/Identibase if it would tell you who they belonged to - might have been re-homed without changing the details.

RE: Beep beep

Neil Wheadon — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 16:55:08 GMT

She was chipped as a child by Mrs Nice but Dim from Islington who wanted to track her every movement especially as that terrible Mr Corbyn was her local MP.

I know it's going to be a 'smart answer' but let's play along with this

Neil

PS Answer appeared as I typed, guess most of us were thinking this but were too shy to type it

RE: Beep beep

J G Wray — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 16:54:42 GMT

[quote user="Utlendigur"]But there were 2 chips - one in each cup? Just wondering - do breast implants have chips???[/quote]

Oh yes they do. Blimey that was hard work.

RE: Beep beep

Wren — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 16:03:26 GMT

[quote user="Clive Ansell"]

The dog or its owner have recently consumed processed meat products containing horsemeat, along with microchips which were implanted within said horses.

[/quote]

Mmmmm. Nuchal ligament. Tasty...

RE: Beep beep

Clive Ansell — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 14:50:03 GMT

The dog or its owner have recently consumed processed meat products containing horsemeat, along with microchips which were implanted within said horses.

RE: Beep beep

Utlendigur — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 14:40:05 GMT

[quote user="bob lehner"]

She had another very small dog (or maybe not so small), which had been chipped, secreted in her brassiere?

[/quote]

But there were 2 chips - one in each cup? Just wondering - do breast implants have chips???

RE: Beep beep

bob lehner — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 14:05:38 GMT

She had another very small dog (or maybe not so small), which had been chipped, secreted in her brassiere?

RE: Beep beep

J G Wray — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 12:15:50 GMT

[quote user="George Cooper"]sha'd eaten one of her dogs which had been chipped.[/quote]

Dear God George, this isn't Wales

RE: Beep beep

George Cooper — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 11:49:53 GMT

sha'd eaten one of her dogs which had been chipped.

RE: Beep beep

J G Wray — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 11:36:13 GMT

[quote user="Martin Atkinson"]The client is a criminal and tagged; she is a criminal and has pocketed a load of chips; she is a drug smuggler and swallowed a load of pouches of cocaine which are tagged to identify them; she has some sort of electronic device implanted - pacemaker for example; she has some weird body piercings with electronics included....... [/quote]

Nope, none of these. The client is, as far as I know, not a criminal, although deeply misguided about her dogs.

RE: Beep beep

Martin Atkinson — Thu, 27 Jul 2017 09:29:23 GMT

[quote user="J G Wray"]Answers on the back of a postcard[/quote]The client is a criminal and tagged; she is a criminal and has pocketed a load of chips; she is a drug smuggler and swallowed a load of pouches of cocaine which are tagged to identify them; she has some sort of electronic device implanted - pacemaker for example; she has some weird body piercings with electronics included.......