Dealing with death dealing

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Thomas Johnson — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 11:00:01 GMT

[quote user="Tim Cheyne"]

I have to admit that I was rather taken aback by this thread; the idea of sympathy cards has never entered my head and I am not convinced that it is a good idea. Seems too artificial, as I suspect that it really is. We are professionals, not insurance salesmen (Oh, wait a minute!............perhaps some are. )

[/quote]

We send sympathy cards to most of ou clients whose pets are euthanased or have died at home. We don't generally send them to people whose pets we haven'tt seen before, or for several years before the euthanasia. The cards are handwritten by the vet who dealt with the case, I try and make them personal, but it's not always easy. We do get clients who come in and thank us for the cards.

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Tim Cheyne — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 19:12:28 GMT

[quote user="Michael Woodhouse"]

Sympathy cards are just something that we have never done. We're not as 'touchy feely' as a lot of you.

[/quote]

Tim.

Re: Dealing with death dealing

bob lehner — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 12:54:03 GMT

[quote user="Michael Woodhouse"]Should I send them all a card?[/quote]

'Deepest sympathy - Our thoughts are with ewe' ...?

I' m not a great one for generalised sympathy cards- smacks of insincerity - particular when churned out regardless by the practice manager or receptionist. Too trans-Atlantic for my taste.

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Utlendigur — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 11:10:33 GMT

[quote user="Michael Woodhouse"] What kind of seed is appropriate for a sheep farmer with a dead ewe?* [/quote]

They might take it as an insult - thinking you were hinting to get out of sheep farming and into arable

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Louise6732 — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 10:08:48 GMT

[quote user="Michael Woodhouse"]What kind of seed is appropriate for a sheep farmer with a dead ewe?* [/quote]

Michael I think you're being a bit flippant. Sympathy cards are generally for companion animals not farm animals, I don't think anyone expects you to send cards to sheep farmers. However, if it was a pet lamb/loved by the family etc, I think a short note in the right circumstances can really bond clients and sometimes it feels appropriate.

Going back to the original post, the seeds idea is nice and something I hadn't thought of before. I don't think it suits for every case but in the right circumstances that might really help someone feel supported by the practice at their time of loss.

Louise

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Michael Woodhouse — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 23:19:01 GMT

Sympathy cards are just something that we have never done. We're not as 'touchy feely' as a lot of you. I have seriously considered having a few in stock for the exceptional case.

Today I have euthanased four animals

A moribund budgie that we had never seen before
A ewe with a ruptured uterus (shoot and salvage caesarian)
A ewe with an comunuted distal tib/fib fracture (caught jumping a gate)
A 12 year old Newfoundland (verified age, we did puppy vaccs) that had been seen twice in the last 12 months. Had gone off back legs overnight

Should I send them all a card? What kind of seed is appropriate for a sheep farmer with a dead ewe?*

(* I may need a bulk quantity, please tell me delivering a dead lamb doesn't require a card, I may need to look into wholesale quantities..........)

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Niall Taylor — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 11:49:18 GMT

[quote user="james herriot lied"] For bad debtors, would you put in a few horsetail seeds or bindweed fragments?[/quote]

We find weaponised anthrax usually conveys the right sentiment!

Niall

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Lorna McHardy — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 10:39:18 GMT

[quote user="james herriot lied"]

For bad debtors, would you put in a few horsetail seeds or bindweed fragments?

[/quote]

Now, there's a fragrant thought! Love this... may I suggest some Japanese Knotweed

Joking apart, it's a nice idea, but as others have said, easy to get wrong. On the other hand, who is really going to get upset by a card with seeds in it? Me, I'd bin them (it's a bit of a weed and I'm fussy about my garden) but I'd assume it's well meant....

I don't think it really matters what you send, the main decision is whether or not to send anything. Most practices I know do.

Re: Dealing with death dealing

james herriot lied — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 09:55:02 GMT

[quote user="J G Wray"]

We slip in little extras, currently we put in a few Nigella seeds (Love-in-the-mist), but pressed flowers ( daisies), other seeds and photos we have of the patients have all made it into envelopes.

JGW

[/quote]

Who are you, and what have you done with the unflinchingly unsentimental Jonathon Wray?

Nice touches, BTW - particularly the nigella, as it tends to self-seed beautifully and will come up year after year. Not something I've really thought about, but as I say, a nice touch. I tend to send a short handwritten note if it's been an involved process, or if the client is a regular and I know them by name; otherwise, it sometimes can feel intrusive to send cards to people who, say, haven't been in the practice for five or six years.

For bad debtors, would you put in a few horsetail seeds or bindweed fragments?

Re: Dealing with death dealing

Neil Wheadon — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 09:54:59 GMT

I've always held the view that you need to be terribly careful in this area as it's very easy to get things badly wrong. For those bonded clients an appreciation of knowing them and their pet will be appreciated whilst those on the cusp will often be turned off by what you are doing.

For example what if 2 friends have had their animals put to sleep, one gets the card and seeds the other doesn't? The one who doesn't will feel devalued and may look elsewhere next time their pet is ill.

Conversely sending out sympathy cards to every client can be seen in a bad light too and the worst example I ever saw was 'We sympathise with your loss and look forward to welcoming your new puppy' If that was me, I'd never go back.